Okay enough Graphics and colors right how about a real update huh? Well lets work in reverse order. No wait that’s too hard I’ll start on Thursday night forward. (side note: I’m runnin on like 6 hours of sleep in the last 3 days so if this is hard to follow I’m sorry and those hours are only when I dropped from exhaustion I’ll explain why soon) Well Thursday I gave Kawaii a note stating to the Angel that if he did not make it more than crystal clear how he felt about me I was dropping him like a bad habbit because I’m tired of being ignored and taken for granted. So I’m online and Kawaii signs in and we talked for a bit and then she says the Angel had just walked in. So my pulse rate doubles easily and I spat good for him and he gets on and apologizes and blah blah blah and I acted as cold as humanly possible until I just couldn’t stand it and I told him even though I was mad with him I still loved him. So in anycase I got off and went to bed within a few minutes. The next morning (Friday) I didn’t expect a note (I try not to get my hopes up anymore) then Justin pulls an envelope out of his pocket(which I’m sure he read but I don’t give a damn) It was a three page letter for little old me and I was SO happy. I scared the hell out of Peter’s Love interest by actually being perky at 7 in the morning . Then Peter got a glomp and was like what in God’s name and I gave him the 411 and he seemed happy (I say seemed because I’ll explain later) The rest of the day was a natural high while others were down and out I forced them to be happy just for me. Which at lunch almost got me thrown into the water fountain. Well then I let Peter read my mail and well I’m sure he was happy that I was happy but something seemed a miss. Like he was thinking that this guy in no way had done anything to deserve me. Not jealousy, I think brotherly concern. So let me sum up what the note consisted of a full recount of the first time we held hands and then kissed. So that was like Wow he remembered all that. Then a promise that if he didn’t see me he’d come to my house and ask for my parents blessing on our marriage. Then a brief little blah thing on what he’s been doing that kept him from writing me a God damn note. Then that’s about it. So I asked Peter to read it in hopes of guidance as to how to answer to something like that. I mean to simply forgive him for all the crap he’s put me through in the last year is kind of being stupid. Then to simply deny him for being human and making mistakes would be completely heartless. I mean come on. But then Peter himself couldn’t give me guidance I mean I understand that he has never been in a situation like this but I see him as being extremely wise. I don’t think of it as him failing me I think of him being honest and saying I just don’t know. I shouldn’t depend so much on his opinion I feel that I perhaps am taking advantage of his loving nature I have to quit that Okay well now Saturday I worked on my power point (at like 4 am…) and after a few hours later Dan signed in and he wanted to know why I was so grumpy. Here’s the lack of sleep explanation. You see I think a lot of people are physic (not like Miss. Cleo call me now for your free reading) like I’ve met this person before or finishing people sentences or telling them about an event they’re about to tell you about. Or dreams coming true at random or visions when you touch certain people. Well stuff like that happens to me a lot and since I was young and I don’t like not knowing what’s happening in dreams because not understanding or misinterpreting a dream or denying a strong feeling can lead to people getting hurt or worse. So the last few nights I’ve been having BAD dreams and I have no clue how to interpret them. I mean like the dreams I’ve had involving other people like Kawaii and Ive I’ve understood (I think and hope) and issued warnings but the ones involving me have so many possible meanings I’m confused. Thus when I’m sick because I can’t figure them out or because my link is sick. It’s allergies but I don’t have any but my link is allergic to almost everything. My dreams (3 to be exact) are reoccurring and well one is fine but puzzling and the other two I wake up crying from. It’s driving me nuts. And lastly the last two days Saturday and Sunday have been spent cleaning the Nagasaki Shrine (a.k.a. my house) for the brief return of my father. I hope we don’t get in to a fight the short time he’s home. It’s not that we don’t get along it’s that we both have strong and stubborn personalities so it’s kinda like two storms waiting to happen. Or as Peter would call me a Fire waiting to ignite. I any case that’s the news… no wait Brie I got FY # 4 I haven’t read it yet cause I got an 8 hour road trip on Friday and I was wondering if I could burrow 2 and 3 for the trip. You can read 4 first as long as I get it by Thursday (I’m not going to school Friday)